The Remains of my Day

Yurt

2011-12-29T13:44:00.004-06:00

I want to live in a yurt. There, I said it.

This is not the time to tell me that its impractical or uncomfortable. I don't want to hear it. I just want to have my yurt fantasy.

I want to live in a yurt with a nice porch. And a good internet connection. Something like this will do:

For candy houses this year, I made a candy yurt. My fantasy yurt would be best if it were, in fact, made of pretzels and had hershey kisses for solar arrays.

Candy Houses

2011-12-29T13:09:00.017-06:00

One of my favorite activities at the holidays is making candy houses with my family.

We don't do classic gingerbread houses because, well, I'm too impatient to make gingerbread and construct the appropriate architecture. Instead, my husband makes cardboard house forms which we cover in candy.

Going to the store to purchase various kinds of candy is a great part of the fun of this activity. However, it is a little embarrassing to check out with a cart full of junk food!

Once home, we use icing to stick the candy (and cookies, and pretzels, etc!) to the cardboard.

Here are pictures of our process and this year's houses....

And here are our finished houses:

Happy New Year * 2011

2011-01-04T15:08:00.001-06:00

This is my New Year’s prayer, stolen from the words of Thomas Merton.

“My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going, I do not see the road ahead of me, I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road, though I may know nothing about it. Therefore, I will trust you always, though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.”

Amen

Post Script

2010-03-18T15:23:00.002-05:00

Apropos of my last posting, I should mention that I'd also like to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony.

Childhood Memories

2010-03-17T20:20:00.005-05:00

Over dinner tonight the whole family was trading memories of favorite childhood TV shows. Even though the youngest member of our household is 10 years old, he has enough distance from the "old" shows he used to watch (BOB THE BUILDER, THE WIGGLES, BEAR IN THE BIG BLUE HOUSE) to participate!

The 16 year old reminisced about SESAME STREET, BIG COMFY COUCH, BETWEEN THE LIONS, and (yes, it's true!) BARNEY!

I bring this up because EK and I both share special memories of one particular 1970s show. In fact, we both decided that it formed our love for social studies, geography, and culture. And it probably also made us politically and socially liberal!

So, who else remembers THE BIG BLUE MARBLE??

This is Why My Husband is a Great Dad

2010-02-23T19:33:00.003-06:00

Special K is a Super Dad.

This evening, the end of an exciting snow day in central Texas, my husband fashioned body sleds for the children out of large leaf bags. Yet one more reason why I love this man!

Snowy Morning in my Texas Backyard

2010-02-23T09:57:00.001-06:00

The Chickens with the Boxer

2010-02-17T14:15:00.000-06:00

Pretty Pullets!

2010-01-11T21:08:00.016-06:00

You know what happens when you feed a baby chick? She turns into a pullet!!

Our four chickens are now almost seven weeks old and they are healthy little chirping, eating, clucking, pooping machines.

We have two Buff Orpingtons named Omelet and Popcorn. This is Omelet's baby picture and a shot of her today:

This is Popcorn:

And we have two gorgeous Plymouth Rocks named Rockette . . .

and Pebbles . . .

No I know EVERY mama thinks her babies are the cutest. But, seriously, aren't these some pretty pullets!?!

My New Favorite Blog

2009-12-07T11:05:00.002-06:00

This adorable ten-year-old blogger is a bad speller and seems to have little use for punctuation. But his sweet spirit just shines through! Check it out!

http://www.inventors-notebook.blogspot.com/

Operation CHICKEN!

2009-11-29T19:24:00.002-06:00

My family has launched a new adventure: raising chickens!!

On Black Friday we went to Homestead Heritage farm ministries for their annual festival. It's our preferred post-Thanksgiving outing and something I look forward all year long. I especially love seeing the animals because they feed my fantasy of running a tiny hobby farm! This year, our little H-Bomb couldn't tear himself away from the chicken house. He picked up a baby chick and it nestled into his hands like he was the mama chicken! Before you knew it, we had bought ourselves two chicks and a bag of feed. I immediately set out to read everything I could about chicken rearing. (Yes, I realize that a reasonable person would have researched first and bought chicks second.) Sunday, we went back to get two more babies so that we would be sure to have at least two survive to adulthood.

Two of our chicks are Buff Orpingtons; their names are Popcorn and Omelette. The other two are Barred Rocks, call names Rockette and Pebbles.

For now, all four girls are living in a gerbil cage in the house. Soon they'll move into a temporary winter home in the garage. Meanwhile, we're going to build a small chicken coop for them in the backyard. More on that (and pictures as they grow) later!

ELCA Statement on Human Sexuality

2009-08-23T18:44:00.002-05:00

My national church organization recently met and, among other actions, voted on a long-awaited Statement on Human Sexuality. It's a long--and very interesting--document and it included several special key resolutions. Here's the two BIGGIES. They both passed, though the debate was long and the passing vote was not a landslide:

“Resolved that the ECA commit itself to finding ways to allow congregations that choose to do so to recognize, support, and hold publicly accountable life-long, monogamous, same-gender relationships."

“Resolved, that the ELCA commit itself to finding a way for people in such publicly accountable, lifelong, monogamous, same-gender relationships to serve as rostered leaders of this church.”

Amen.

The Salt Lick; or, Why Life is Funny

2009-08-23T08:07:00.005-05:00

Mmmmmm. Excuse me. I'm still thinking about brisket....and blackberry cobbler....

My first trip to The Salt Lick in Driftwood, TX was back in the 1990s. I was living in Indiana and had flown to San Antonio to visit my best high school pal Leila. I know it was a long time ago because I only had one baby and she *only* had four! We hopped in the car one morning and took a memorable drive to visit the old TX missions outside of San Antonio. From there we took the back way through the Hill Coutnry to tiny Driftwood TX to eat the Best Damn BBQ Ever. The old stone building had a huge fire pit just inside the door and the hole place smelled like wood smoke. Leila gently mocked me for wanting to order bbq chicken when we got there, but frankly I was suspicious of this thing called brisket. Long story short: she ordered, we ate, I never forgot it.

Why life is funny: It's a dozen years later and I now LIVE in Texas with my hubby and two kids! And Leila does NOT live here! And I have just taken my best college pal Nancy (who lives in PITTSBURGH with her excellent husband Mike!) on their virgin trip to The Driftwood. My husband and the babies came along ... our teenager even brought her boyfriend.

To my heart--and my nose--this trip was mere days after my first visit to The Salt Lick with Leila. I do feel different than I did in my late twenties when I was last here--I'm calmer now, more level, more contented than I have ever been. But do I feel OLDER? No. Do I feel like twelve years have passed? No. I don't understand time. I don't think I ever will.

But here's what I know for certain:
Life is an amazing and unexpected journey, folks. And along the way, there's great friends, wonderful loves, beautiful babies, AND bbq!

40

2009-08-15T22:24:00.009-05:00

I turned forty a couple of weeks ago. Now that I've adjusted to the idea, I have this to report about being out of my thirties.

40 Things About Being 40

1. I live with my best friend.
2. I am in love.
3. My kids are funny and smart and a blast to hang out with.
4. I love my job.
5. I think I really have something to teach my students.
6. I have never cared less about what other people think of me.
7. I have to get up in the middle of the night to pee.
8. I am really, really educated.
9. There's so much I don't know.
10. I'm saved by the grace of God.
11. I finally think I know what "saved" means.
12. I will never have more babies.
13. I don't know how to flat iron my hair and will never learn.
14. I'm old enough for eighties fashion to have become cool again
15. I'm not too old to like cool new music.
16. I remember when we got our first microwave oven.
17. I remember when there were no personal computers.
18. I remember when there were only three channels on TV.
19. I remember when we had rotary telephone dials.
20. I get to hang out with artists for a living.
21. I make art.
22. I don't work in a cubicle.
23. I finally bought myself the dog I want.
24. I still haven't bought myself the car I want.
25. I have some gray hair.
26. I don't have wrinkles.
27. I can't remember the last time I drank alcohol.
28. I was absolutely right about how little math I would need to be a functioning adult.
29. I'm becoming lactose intolerant.
30. I can be deeply patient with people I love.
31. I can feel sincere compassion and love for people I meet.
32. I have less of a sweet tooth than I used to.
33. I hate Wal-Mart.
34. I can light a charcoal grill fire.
35. I can mow the yard.
36. I cannot change a tire.
37. My 16 year old is way cooler than I was at 16.
38. I am way cooler than the 40 year olds I knew when I was 16.
39. I don't think my personal coolness has yet peaked.
40. I am full of hope.

2009-08-13T23:35:00.003-05:00

I followed a facebook game to do the following:

Think quick! List your top 15 films. Don't take too long to think about it. Fifteen movies you've seen that will always stick with you. First fifteen you can recall in no more than 15 minutes.

So here's my list:

I KNOW WHERE I'M GOING
My favorite film. Period. (nod to Laurie!)

APOLLO 13
I just eat up this celebration of ingenuity, technology, team work, and real heroism.

SOME LIKE IT HOT
Funniest film ever made.

THE GODFATHER
One of my favorite American tragedies.

QUIZ SHOW
My other favorite American tragedy!.

SPIRITED AWAY
I think this is the prettiest animated film I've ever seen

SENSE AND SENSIBILITY
Oh,my! Jane Austen adapted by Emma Thompson and filmed by Ang Lee! Plus a romantic turn by Allan Rickman! Perfection!

THE REMAINS OF THE DAY
I am blue for about two days after every viewing of this beautiful story of duty, loneliness, and love. I always go back for more.

WHEN HARRY MET SALLY
Kemper and I went to the movies to see this about five times when we were dating. "... when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible."

GOSFORD PARK
Gorgeous. Funny. Heartbreaking. I watch it whenever I get the house to myself.

THE FUGITIVE
I don't know what it is about the this movie, but I can't resist it.

SPLASH
This is why I love Tom Hanks."All my life I've been waiting for someone and when I find her, she's... she's a fish."

THIS IS SPINAL TAP
This is the movie that frames my college life. We watched it so much we could recite whole scenes...and frequently did.

SIXTEEN CANDLES
My teen 1980s. Thank you, John Hughes.

GROUNDHOG DAY
This is a perfect little movie. Harold Ramis and Bill Murray usually make a misstep somewhere. But not this time!!

ELCA Youth Gathering

2009-07-29T22:04:00.002-05:00

I was just in New Orleans, along with what seems to have been every teenager in the ELCA (Evangelical Lutheran Church in America). It was time for the Youth Gathering which takes place every three years. My daughter went with our church youth group, and I headed to the city separately for some much-needed R&R with family.

It was a beautiful thing to witness. I didn't plan to see the gathering, but everywhere I went in the city there were Lutheran kids! A third of the gathering did service each day, all wearing BRIGHT orange work shirts. Driving around, I saw kids clearing yards, gutting houses, working in parks, cleaning the streets. They looked hot, sweaty, and very happy!

In total, about 37,000 young Christians gave 250,000 hours of community service to the city!

When they were not working or doing activities in the Convention Center, the young people visited the great sights of New Orleans. Now, you have to understand that this is easily one of my favorite world cities! I loved seeing the kids (often in matching youth group shirts from their home churches) on the street car, at the art market, eating in restaurants, and taking LOTS of photos. The power of their economic impact to local business is almost as important as their servant work.

Speaking of money, the kids brought change from their home congregations, and from their own pockets, to donate to a youth-led movement called "Change for Change." The collected funds are dedicated to help fight hunger. The youth raised over $130,000 at this event.

I know the kids had a good time playing, learning, and serving. They were a blessing TO the city, and they were blessed BY the city. God is amazing!

I pray that my own teenager will forever be changed by this experience of living out her Baptismal promise. As she becomes an adult, I pray that she will respond to God's call to deliver love whenever and wherever it is needed. I pray that she will be bold to speak up against injustice even when it is risky. I pray that she will never stop finding ways to be God's hands and feet in the world.

The joy of a GREAT hymn!

2009-06-14T15:39:00.008-05:00

Wow! Some wonderful hymns were selected for worship in our church this morning. I don't know if I should be thanking our ministers of music (the inimitable Sha, Jonathan, and Emily) or our phenomenal guest pianist (Chris). But whoever made the selections today--I applaud you! I wish that I had NOT been a communion assistant this morning just because I really wanted to sing the songs!!

(Speaking of singing, there was also a pretty little hymn called "You Are the Seed" presented in a lovely solo by Kathy.)

My favorite of the day (and its hard to pick!) is "Earth and All Stars". It's just one of those hymns that gives me joy because the lyrics are SO GOOD and SO TRUE and so much what my heart wants to sing!

"Earth and All Stars"

Earth and all stars,
loud rushing planets--sing to the Lord a new song!
O victory,
loud shouting army--sing to the Lord a new song!
He had done marvelous things.
I, too, will praise him with a new song!

Hail, wind, and rain,
loud blowing snowstorms--sing to the Lord a new song!
Flowers and trees,
loud rustling leaves--sing to the Lord a new song!
He had done marvelous things.
I, too, will praise him with a new song!

Trumpet and pipes,
loud clashing cymbals--sing to the Lord a new song!
Harp, lute, and lyre,
loud humming cellos--sing to the Lord a new song!
He had done marvelous things.
I, too, will praise him with a new song!

Engines and steel,
loud pounding hammers--sing to the Lord a new song!
Limestone and beams,
loud building workers--sing to the Lord a new song!
He had done marvelous things.
I, too, will praise him with a new song!

Classrooms and labs,
loud boiling test tubes--sing to the Lord a new song!
Athlete and band,
loud cheering people--sing to the lord a new song!
He had done marvelous things.
I, too, will praise him with a new song!

Knowledge and truth,
loud sounding wisdom--sing to the Lord a new song!
Daughter and son,
loud praying members--sing to the Lord a new song!
He had done marvelous things.
I, too, will praise him with a new song!

(Words by Herbert F. Brokering, Music by David N. Johnson)

Sing a your new song TODAY!!

Plants! Plants! Plants!

2009-06-13T16:00:00.012-05:00

So this morning, instead of working I went to some yard sales and to the garden center with Special K. After 18 years of marriage, its amazing how much fun we have doing simple things together! Found a few things for his classroom (please, please, let him have a classroom soon!!) at the yard sales. Then we hit one of our favorite nurseries in town.

(pictured here is a Blackfoot Daisy, one of purchases from earlier this summer. It's so SWEET!! It's little but doing well!!)

Here's what we bought today!

Salvia Greggii (color: "navajo rose")

A Bottlebrush Plan (Callistemon)

A purple Butterly Bush (latin name: Buddleia)

And our MOST EXCITING new purchase...

An Ocotillo plant!!!!

I'll let you know how they do. I'm very excited. Playing in the dirt is WAY more fun than editing my book manuscript!!

Ouch!

2009-05-15T22:44:00.008-05:00

I hurt. It hurts to sit and type this right now at the end of a long day of work. I've been hurting since September. At the risk of sounding like an old woman who talks about her pains all the time, I thought I'd tell you what was up.

For about ten years I have successfully ignored the stiffness in my back and neck, and the annoyingly increasing problem of my arms going numb. I figured those were the reasonable outcomes of knitting, quilting, and basically working at a desk too much for a living.

But in the fall, I developed bad pain in my forearms, wrists, and hands. I started using bands for tendonitis ("tennis elbow") on my forearms and it helped a little. But the wrist pain got worse and I kept feeling weak in the arms and hands. One day I grabbed something with my left hand and felt a horrible rip. My hand swelled and the back of my hand bruised. This finally sent me to the doc who said I had tendonitis and severe carpal tunnel syndrome causing me to tear a ligament or muscle. He poked me with a pin and discovered that I had lost feeling in several parts of my fingers. I wore wrist braces day and night for a month. No real improvement happened which was weird.

He ordered an electrical conduction study (not fun!) to see where my nerve damage really was. The results of that were strange so I found myself going through an MRI of my neck followed by a series of x-rays and a consultation with a neurosurgeon. This in turn resulted in a second MRI of my brain (I have decided I hate MRIs). These tests were drawn out and those weeks were a very frustrating period. I was in constant pain and had no help except drugs which made me feel bad.

Finally, several things were decided:

I have a birth defect called a Chiari Malformation. This means I have a congenital abnormality at the base of my brain stem which has resulted in herniation of my cerebellar tonsils. There's a bunch of swelling in places of my brain and spinal column that aren't supposed to swell.

I have a bulging disc in my neck (cervical disc herniation) and swelling in my spinal column at the neck.

I have bone spurs in my neck and some arthritis.

All of this has caused stenosis and neuropathy, which basically means I my hands, arms, shoulders, back, neck, and head hurt/don't work well/go numb because the nerves are ANGRY.

I also DO have severe tendonitis, carpal tunnel syndrome, and (here's a new word I learned!) thorasic outlet syndrome. These problems were all caused by a combination of the neurological problems above and the fact that I sit at a computer a lot.

As if that wasn't enough, the brain MRI also showed an odd area that could be nothing serious ("just the way God made you" as my neurosurgeons says) or could be some other problem ("do you have a family history of multiple sclerosis" asks my neuosurgeon nonchalantly). Nothing was decided about this but it will be monitored with more brain MRIs in three months, six months, a year, etc.

I've been treated a lot in the last five weeks since I got my cluster of diagnoses. I was given transdural cortisone shot (nasty procedure of putting drugs into my spinal column with a big needle!) in order to reduce the swelling of my nerve roots. I have also been in physical therapy with an amazing doctor. I get TENS (transcutaneous electrical nerve stimulation), trigger point pressure, manual traction, ultrasound therapy, and cold treatments. My therapist hopes that soon my pain will be down enough for me to do exercises for my problem areas.

I have a lot less pain now and much more movement ability. I can't sit in one position for too long or things start hurting, and typing is a chore I have to plan carefully to avoid paying for it later. My headaches and neck aches are much rarer, and my arms don't go numb nearly as often. This is great change and I'm pleased. At the same time, I don't think I'm out of the woods. If I don't work on this continuously I will quickly be right back where I was a few weeks ago. And I don't know what my chiari malformation might mean down the road, nor do I know if the additional brain MRIs will reveal anything of concern.

So that's what's been eating my life in the last months (while being a mom, teaching full time, traveling some as a consultant, running a grad program, and trying to finish a manuscript). If I've been a bad correspondent, now you know why! I'll let you know if and when I learn more about any of this!

Peace! Love!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

2008-11-27T21:42:00.005-06:00

This is the prayer we said communally at our congregation's Thanksgiving service on Tuesday evening. It spoke to my heart and I wanted to share it with you all.

O come, let us workshop and bow down, let us kneel before God our Maker.
We come in humility, opening ourselves to God's wisdom and strength.
We are the people of God's pasture and the sheep of God's hand.
We come with expectation, that in God's presence we may know ourselves and one another, and be truly at home in the world.
So this evening we offer thanksgiving for all the gifts that have been showered upon us.
We offer thanks not only for the bounty and abundance we have, but also for troubles that shape and sharpen our patience, for doubts that let faith moments shine, and for confusion that keeps our lives from being rigid.
We offer thanks for sufferings that help us share another's grief, for fears that mark real terror in the world, and for pains that open our eyes to joy.
For sorrows that join our hands to hope and for loneliness that leads us to the heart of God.
For all those gifts by which we have become more human, we give thanks.
Now may our thanks reach out and embrace the daily small ingratitudes of our lives.
Oh, come, let us worship and bow down.
Let us kneel before God and Maker.

AMEN! AMEN! AMEN!

We have a winner!

2008-11-27T21:26:00.005-06:00

First place in the category of TALLEST cake goes go H-Bomb and Special K for their cake creation "The Heart of the Woods"!

Touch up work before judging!

You can see how much the beat out the others for TALLEST!

CONGRATS BOY!!!!

Why I Love My Family

2008-11-23T17:37:00.004-06:00

As you may know, H-Bomb is a cub scout. Well, he's a Webelo now actually. He loves scouting and he loves doing projects with his awesome crafty Daddy.

Tomorrow is the annual "Dad and Lad Cake Bake" contest for the scout pack. H-Bomb and Special K have done well in the past, though they have not won the overall prize yet. I know they want it bad!

This year's theme was announced: "Into the woods." They have both been thinking about it for a couple of days.

Special K came up with an idea for the cake today (during church mind you, but I'm not scolding) and he pitched it to the boy after we got home. His idea is to make what looks like a hollow log--using all edible materials of course--and to put inside the log, visible through a hole, a pretty little cupcake. It's witty, right? Into the woods!

So he sketched it showed the idea to H-Bomb. The boy thought it was exciting but he kept suggesting additions that sounded weird to his dad. "So this is the tree her mom is in and we maybe could see her inside this log, right? Or is this like the tall thing Repunzel is in"?

What?? Dad had a weird look on his face trying to process this.

Then the boy said, "Oh! Wait! I thought you meant the musical, Into the Woods!"

This is why I love my family! Thank God!

God Bless America

2008-11-05T11:55:00.002-06:00

"As Lincoln said to a nation far more divided than ours, we are not enemies but friends. Though passion may have strained, it must not break our bonds of affection."
President-Elect Barack Obama

TIME

2008-11-02T20:11:00.002-06:00

Thank your Daylight Savings Time! I have NEVER in my LIFE been so happy to have an extra hour show up for the weekend. I tend to have overly busy days lately, and it is a source of much meditation. I would like to simplify my personal schedule as part of my overall movement towards LESS. I would like LESS time stress. I am not the only person out there who has super hectic days all too often--I know what some of your lives are like!!! But I have to say this was a doozey of a weekend for me and my family. I would like to share so that you can appreciate how much we loved that extra hour.....

Friday
6:00 pm Take Henry Trick-or-Treating
6:30 pm Take Henry in costume to visit Grammie
7:00 pm Go to football game at Midway High School
10:30 pm See Midway beat Waco High 26-14
11:00 pm Pick Gracie up from the Band hall and head home
12:00 am BED

Saturday
7:30 am Drop Henry off downtown in full Webelo Scout uniform for start of Homecoming Parade
8:30 am Drop Gracie off at High School to leave for out of town band competition
9:00 am Park on Baylor campus and find a spot to watch the parade (Penny the Boxer gets to come along, too!)
11:00 am Pick Henry up at end of the parade and go to West for a celebratory kolache!
12:oo pm Go home and do week's laundry plus all the housework I can fit in three hours.
3:00 pm Prepare car and candy for "Trunk or Treat"
4:00 pm Head to Church with Henry to set up the car for "Trunk or Treat"
4:30 pm Hand out candy to neighborhood kids and congregation families in our church
parking lot.
6:30 pm Clean up and pack up from "Trunk or Treat"
7:00 pm Stop at grocery store for dinner supplies.
7:45 pm Eat dinner--Kemper's delicious Tofu Piccata with home made pasta...mmm!
8:30 pm Put Henry to bed.
9:00 pm Grade papers.
10:00 pm Watch TV with Kemper
1:00 am Wait while Kemper goes to pick up Gracie from the High School (just back from that out of town competition!)
1:30 am BED

Sunday
9:00 am Out the door for church
9:15 am Meeting at church
10:00 am Ran away before worship (Sorry, Jesus! Love you!) to head off to see dear friend!!!
12:00 pm Arrived in Granbury, TX after two hour drive. Get to see Terence who is in from Northern Ireland! Hurray! (Thanks, Jesus!)
5:00 pm Leave Granbury and head back to Woodway
7:00 pm Arrive back home and eat dinner.
8:30 pm Put Henry to bed.
8:45 pm Write this note and put it on blog.

Whew! I am a TIRED mama now! And I still need to fold clothes and do some more grading. But I'd say this is nothing compared to how tired Gracie is! She went to school all day Friday, performed Friday night, traveled from 8:30 am -2:30 am Saturday/Sunday, and then came along with the family to Granbury today. Sleepy girl!!

36 Hour Vacation!

2008-10-15T21:12:00.009-05:00

Our family specializes in the micro-mini-getaway road trip vacation. It comes from years of graduate school living! This weekend we did one of our signature trips with a 36 hour outing to Gruene, Texas and San Antonio. We had a blast, as we usually do when confined in near proximity for several non-stop hours. I am so lucky to live with these people!

Thought you'd enjoy some pictures.

Funniest Shakespeare Cartoon Ever. Bam!

2008-10-15T15:59:00.005-05:00

Shed for YOU

2008-10-07T22:02:00.005-05:00

At my church we put a lot of emphasis on holy communion, the receiving of God's gift of God's self in the form of bread and wine. This is good for me because I grew up Catholic and have a real attachment to the sacrament of communion. I'm a Lutheran style Christian now and this church doesn't teach the transubstantiation of my familiar Catholicism. Instead they believe that Christ's "Real Presence" is within the elements of communion.

As we share communion each Sunday, our pastor puts a small piece of broken bread into the open hands of each congregant and says, "The body of Christ, given for you." Another person then offers a sip of wine to each congregant and says, "The blood of Christ, shed for you."

A couple of weeks ago, I was that person carrying the wine and offering it to each of my sisters and brothers. I stopped at each person and said the words, "The blood of Christ, shed for you" over and over again. I said these words to my friends when they came to kneel for communion. I said them to kids and to old people. I said them to people in the church whose names I still don't know. I said it to people who have hurt my feelings. I said it to people who I've been snarky about.

As I said these words, they became a prayer. Not a benediction to my sisters and brothers but a reminder to me that God's grace is given luxuriously and freely to all who come forward with open hands. This is the reality of my faith. Saying these words made this reality so overwhelming present for me that Sunday.

Here indeed is the Real Presence of God in holy communion!

My Friday Night!

2008-09-27T22:47:00.002-05:00

When did this happen?

2008-09-27T20:02:00.003-05:00

Parenting

2008-09-27T19:45:00.010-05:00

Here's the thing about being a parent: the kids are watching you and learning. Yes, we all know that children learn to speak and socialize and use a fork by observing the parental bigjobs (Terry Pratchett speak makes me happy!). But the little ones are learning a helluva lot more than that from us.

Sometimes this is beautifully enlightening, like when your child bends down to tenderly look a crying child in the face and ask if they are OK, and you recognize the gesture as your own.

All too often the realization that you are being learned from is horrifying, like when your child curses in public, or expresses insecurity about having big feet, or has an overwhelmed with schoolwork freak-out in which you hear your own voice coming out of her mouth.

Recently, my roomate H-bomb said something that made me recognize the trickledown of my personal desiire for LESS. He was doing a word problem for math homework, one designed to make the student use simple division. He read it out loud to me. "Adrienne has 150 CDs," the question began. Then, in sublime parenthetical judgement, he added "which is ridiculous" before continuing, "and she wants to store equal numbers of CDs in two containers. How many go in each?" He thought for a moment and then summized, "That would be 75 CDs each. Which is still too many."

:)

Less

2008-09-18T15:19:00.009-05:00

This week we gave away a giant bag of clothing. It's all stuff that EK or I have kept around just in case we might have a reason to wear it....or to fit into it...or for it to come back in style. Meanwhile, the clothes we actually WEAR have to live much of their lives ignobly stuffed in a full closet or stacked on top of a full dresser.

The things I use and that work for me I will take good care. They will be shown kindness. The things I don't use are moochers living in my house past their welcome. They should leave.

My Recovery

2008-09-18T15:19:00.005-05:00

Just so you know, I haven't accidentally taken someone else's prescription stimulants in nearly a week. Thank you. Thank you.

One day at time...

My Rehab

2008-09-14T17:26:00.003-05:00

I slept! Yeah!

After being awake for 40 consecutive hours due to the accidental ingestion of high doses of anti-narcolepsy medicine, I finally felt sleepy and went to bed. I slept hard! Saturday I had low energy and today I could use a nap. Otherwise, I seem OK.

My SINCERE apologies to any and all of you who were subjected to my obnoxious, fast, and LOUD mania on Friday.

Today, I am once again drug free. Unless you count coffee--and then I'm in really big trouble.

I celebrated my recovery by attending church where I had the very good pleasure of hearing this mini-concert. The musicians are Rachel, Andrew, and Henry:

My Drug Problem

2008-09-12T02:23:00.006-05:00

Hi! It's 2:30 am in Central Texas. Want to hear a funny story???

This summer I went on a three-week trip to Paris, London, and Stratford. Worried about the misery of jet lag, I packed some medicine to help me sleep and to help me stay awake. I brought along Tylenol PM tablets to help me go to sleep at bed time in my destination cities. And I brought some of EK's narcolepsy pills to help me stay awake if needed the first couple of days in Europe. EK takes one of these every morning and often another half later in the afternoon. They keep him from being on the verge of napping all day long. The med he takes is used by night-shift workers to help them stay awake when their bodies don't want to. And it's used by the military to help soldiers and pilots work for crazy hours before sleeping. It's non-habit forming and highly effective. I thought taking a half a pill might be a good way to handle sleepiness. I put about six of the stay awake pills in a used travel-sized bottle of generic ibuprofen and jetted off to Europe.

Turns out I only used the Tylenol PM on the airplane and I only took a half of one of EK's pills on the first day in Paris. I carried home the rest of the meds. Unpacked all that stuff at some point---it's a blur of happy messy returning--and thought nothing more of the pills.

Flash forward to tonight!!. Er...last night I guess. Struggling with a head cold and a cough I took a decongestant and (drum roll please) TWO generic ibuprofen pills that I found in a bottle in the medicine cabinet.

There it was! Did you see what just happened?

Should I point out that it is now 2:35am??

At first I thought my "second wind" was a jolt from the pseudo-speed or whatever they put in decongestants. I used the energy to do some correspondence, grade a couple of papers, surf some favorite blogs, write some entries elsewhere in the blogosphere.

When it got to be midnight and EK had gone to bed without me, I thought "this is odd!"

When I went and laid down in the bed because, after all, it was 2 am and I should really be tired, I noticed that my brain was working at high activity and my muscles were jittery.

And that's when it hit me!

OH HOLY CRAP I TOOK TWO OF EK'S STAY AWAKE PILLS AT 8:00 PM I DID NOT TAKE IBUPROFEN I TOOK MEDICATION INTENDED TO ARTIFICIALLY GENERATE AN ADRENALINE RESPONSE AND KEEP ME AWAKE FOR WAY LONGER THAN THE BODY NATURALLY WANTS TO BE AWAKE I AM THE MOST ALERT PERSON IN THE WORLD I DON'T EVEN REMEMBER WHAT SLEEPY FEELS LIKE HOW IS HE SLEEPING HOW ARE THE KIDS SLEEPING WHY DO WE HAVE ALL THESE BEDS I CAN FEEL MY BRAIN BUZZING IF I WERE AT WORK I COULD WRITE THAT BOOK CHAPTER THATS BEEN ON MY TO DO LIST FOR A MONTH I COULD WRITE THE WHOLE BOOK I COULD JOG I SHOULD JOG EVERY DAY WHY DON'T I JOB EVERY DAY I COULD RUN A MARATHON IF I REALLY PUT MY MIND TO TRAINING I THINK I'LL GOOGLE MARATHONS I THINK I'LL WASH ALL THE CLOTHES IN THE HOUSE AND REFOLD ALL THE TOWELS AND MAYBE ALPHABETIZE THE KIDS BOOKS IF I TURN THE LIGHTS ON DO YOU THINK THEY'LL WAKE UP I CAN SEE THE DARK I THINK I HAVE DEVELOPED SUPER POWERS AWESOME I AM AWAKE WOMAN HEAR ME ROAR I REALLY WONDER IF I WILL SLEEP BEFORE THE WEEKEND IS OVER I HAVE TO TEACH ALL DAY TOMORROW WONDER HOW THAT WILL GO I HOPE I DON'T TALK TOO LOUD OH BRAVO TV I LOVE BRAVO TV I COULD BE DESIGNER I THINK I'LL SKETCH SOMETHING....

Luckily I have lots of old Project Runway's on the TiVo. And the internet. And the dog to keep me company.

Wish me luck!

Less: jewelry

2008-09-09T16:28:00.014-05:00

This is how much I had:

This is how much I'm keeping:

The rest has been organized and bagged for giveaways, donations, and yard sale.

Oh, well. It's a start.

Friday Night Lights

2008-09-06T23:23:00.007-05:00

I attended my first ever Texas high school football game last Friday night. Does it surprise you that I had a really good time? 'Cause it surprised the heck out of me.

I went to the game to watch the marching band perform--my roomate Grassy is in the color guard and performs at all the games. But I stayed the whole time and watched the game. And you know what, it was fun.

It's not the very first football game of my life. I watched a good deal of Redskins football with my folks back in the 1980s (we lived outside of DC in those days) and I even attend a few 'Skins games at the old RFK stadium. I always liked yelling "Get him!" to the defense. But to be honest with you I only get about half of the rules of football. And I don't know the names of most of the positions. The only current pro players I know are Peyton Manning and Brett Favre (he's still playing football right?). So it really did surprise me that I had such a pleasant experience watching a whole live game without benefit of replays, loads of graphics, or announcers to explain the game progress.

That being said, I have to confess that I felt like a fraud sitting at the game. I felt like an observer in disguise to study the rites of another culture. Or like a guest at the religious service of an unfamiliar and slightly confusing church. Please don't misunderstand--I don't dislike football fans; some of my best friends are ardent football lovers. I just feel like an outsider to the whole activity. I guess its too late in my life for that to really change. I plan to go back to all the home games--my girl will be performing at them and I can't resister her!--and I hope to develop greater knowledge of the game. But I suspect this will always be a slightly odd experience for me.

Less

2008-09-03T06:27:00.002-05:00

I have been feeling a very strong urge for less. I look at things that I own and don't understand why they are here. Relative to most middle-class Americans I don't really have that much stuff to start with. But its still too much. Why do I own so many DVDs? I haven't re-watched many in years but I store them alphabetically on shelves in my house. Why do I have so many coffee cups? Who the heck do I expect over for a cuppa? Everytime I try to put away the few cups we actually use, I have to deal with the ones that live permanently in my cabinet. Why do I still have earrings I bought in the mid-nineties but haven't worn in years? Why are they in my house? Why do I have to own a box for them to live in on my dresser? These things are not my friends, but I make such room for them. This has to end. Keep reading here for more on my movement for less. Ooo! And maybe some pictures!!!

Gustav

2008-09-01T08:48:00.000-05:00

My brother and his wife are New Orleanians. They have safely left the city (with their cats and assorted friends in need) and are currently riding things out in Baton Rouge. Katrina upset their lives three years ago but thankfully did not cause severe damage or flooding their property. This time could be different. It's scary.

To distract them a bit from CNN, we e-mailed them some stupid homemade video. Several were of the pets. But I think we peaked with what we are calling the "Nutter Butter" series. You must watch them order!

Episode 1: Peace Out

Episode 2: Peace Out...Thirty Years Later

Episode 3: Meta "Peace Out"

DTB Mosaic

2008-09-01T00:41:00.001-05:00

DTB Mosaic
Originally uploaded by totenbeard

This is me in a Mosaic!

My friend Sha posted this on his blog so I, of course, have copied him! All you do is type your answer to each of the questions below into a Flickr search. Using only the first page of results, choose your favorite image, then copy and paste each of the URLs into the mosaic maker (3 columns, 4 rows).

The questions:
1. What is your first name? (DeAnna)
2. What is your favorite food? (Oyster Po-boy)
3. What high school did you attend? (Woodbridge Senior High)
4. What is your favorite color? (lavender)
5. Who is your celebrity crush? (Nathan Fillian)
6. Favorite drink? (coffee)
7. Dream vacation? (Hawaii)
8. Favorite dessert? (tiramisu)
9. What do you want to be when you grow up? (a pathologist like Quincy)
10. What do you love most in life? (my family)
11. One word to describe you. (grateful)
12. Your Flickr name. (totenbeard)